Monday, November 18, 2013

The Bestie Birthday

PS -  I made this (:

So todays is a really important day. Its my best friends birthday. 

We aren't your typical best friends. 

Most girls that are best friends fight all the time - we have maybe had 3 fights in the 4+ years we've been besties. One of them may or may not have been about who got to be the prettiest disney princess...

Only because it was entirely necessary to have these photos resurface
We both know sign language and can sign to each other about you in front of your face and you will be clueless as to what it is we are saying.

I fell in love with her a long time ago but the day I knew that we were going to be best friends for a really long time is when she told me she made wishes on my eyelashes for me. Seriously, it melted my heart.

One time she had to give an impromptu speech about someone she admired and she gave that speech about me. Is that not the cutest thing you've ever heard?!

We park in parking lots to have full on jam sessions to Lady Gaga. We have decided that we are too perfect to be stable so we are the newest unstable element on the periodic table. And I don't think we have ever experienced a normal day together. 

She is the strong one and I'm the one who cries for the both of us. She thinks the only reason I wanted to be friends with her was so I could pick her split ends. 

To be honest, I'm not entirely sure what I contribute to the relationship other than my unconditional love for her. Actually, I can clean/organize pretty well -  so I've got that to offer. Well I mean I guess I know that something magical happens when we are together and we become this one super-being that everyone loves and hates at the same time. They love us because well, we are us. And they hate us because they know that they won't ever be as incredible as we are. 

We happen to be perfect. Go ahead look at the pictures and tell me we aren't perfect. I dare you. If you happen to feel that we aren't perfect then you are wrong. End of discussion.

So now she is 21 and old and I have to wait about a year until I can go out with her ): but anyways - Lindsay (: I hope you are having an amazing birthday and I can't wait to see you when you come home. We will do wonderful winter time things and be all cute and stuff. 

Brian (her boyfriend) made it into the post too cause he's just as awesome as she is 

So I just came to realize that you are more than likely the product of a valentines day adult sleep over.
Incase you never thought about that, now you have. 
You're welcome.

Thursday, November 14, 2013

Follow your dreams. But not your heart?

When we are little we always are told that we can be anything our little heart desires. We are told to chase our dreams and to never let anyone get in the way of them. So we dream up the biggest dream we can think of and let it grow inside of us for years and years. 

So we go through life with all these adults telling us that we shouldn't let anyone stand in the way of what we want to become. When people tell us we aren't good enough most of us have someone there to tell us that isn't true. They tell us that we are amazing and that we WILL indeed be whatever it is we want to be. 

But theres something huge thats left out. 

They don't tell us that one day theres going to be a fork in the road.
That we might meet someone and fall in love. 
They don't tell us that sometimes the dreams clash. 
The thing we have desired our whole lives might not be the thing that will fulfill our hearts longings. 
They don't tell us about the marvel of love or that it could be a dream we have that is just as big as the other things we have been aspiring for our whole lives. 

And I mean, it makes sense to leave it out because when they tell us this we are far too young to be thinking about marriage.  We obviously are aware of love and know we want it. How often do we hear about little girls dreaming up their weddings for when they meet Prince Charming. 

But nobody really tells us that Prince Charming has his own dreams too. Or that our dreams might not leave much time for a family. 

Never have I been told to dream within a certain proximity that will leave room for a family one day. 

But why not tell us that?
I mean for me - my parents are in love; clearly they chose love to be their dream. And I know my parents are happy with their choice. They are very happy. My mom left her dream job in California to come to Arizona with my dad because he had to retire from his dream job because of an injury. She misses her job sometimes. But in the battle between dreams; love won. 

The first time we have to face this problem is when we are graduating high school and are in a relationship with someone we really love. 
Do we go to the same college? 
Who's college do we choose? 
The one that is my dream or the one that is their dream? 

And then it happens again when we are graduating form college. 
If one is graduating before the other is the one who graduated supposed to stick around and wait?
What if one of us wants to go to grad school?
What if the job that I want is in a different place from the job that they want? 

And how do the people who have told us to "always follow our dreams" react to our new found dream dilemma? 

"Yes, however, not following 'your dreams' can bring regret and blame later. She is so young... If they are meant to be together, then they will, later."

But what if they are meant to be together now. When you are apart there is nothing stopping them from falling in love with someone else. And also things happen when you are growing sperately as people. When you grow together, you have an influence on how they are growing. You get to talk about dilemmas and things you see that they might need to work on. And if you go apart and think in 4 year you will be back together, theres going to be so many things that have changed in both people. 

Maybe things will work out after the 4 years apart, but there will always be things that happened in the time apart that you might've wanted to experience with them. Things that you might not like but just learn to accept because you love them. And also there could be hurt from being lonely that goes away but hurt is nothing anyone wants even for a short period of time. 

"But I wasn't gonna change my life to stay with someone. Cause if someone asked me to do that obviously they don't love me."

Really? Do they really not love you because they want you to be together. I would be more upset if someone didn't even want to have a conversation about the possibility of it. 

Maybe you have always seen having your dream job in a certain state. And someone wants you to move to a state thats different from the one you have wanted all along. Well... Can you have your dream job in a different state? If yes then why not compromise. Can you go to a different college and get an education that would be just as good as the college you planned on going to? 

And most of the time when you are the one making the decision you can see that - you know you can do it somewhere else. But the way people react, to us making that decision, is so negative. They say it is unhealthy to feel that way. To be planning our lives around someone else. 

But we crave love. As humans its something that we have deep in our roots. 

And half of our parents got married when they were maybe 20 years old. 
And half of them are still happily married. 
Yet, they still tell us that they don't want us to be compromising on our dream. That they think we aren't making a good choice. 

Why isn't this new dream as important as our old dream. My parents want me to have kids one day. But if I also know that they would be upset if I compromised my dream so that I could be with someone else. 

And I am really frustrated with this. 
They preach to us that love conquers all. But they tell us that our dream of love isn't as important as the dream that we developed when we were 5. 

Any other things we come up with when we are 5 would now be deemed as silly. But the thing we call our dream is held as the most important thing we have ever come up with. 

This behavior is what breeds workaholics. We are told that the job we wanted our whole life is the most important thing to achieve, and love comes second. So we don't balance work and family. This effects other peoples lives. Our spouses, our children. If your spouse chose love over their dream job and you chose your dream job over love, then thats when you start having regret and blame. But this is only happening because everyone is telling us to choose love second. 

We wonder why our society has so many divorces. We have been raised in a way that breeds this doubt about love. That it won't last and it won't be the thing to give you happiness. And this is so dumb. Because there is nothing else that will bring you the kind of happiness that can be found in love. 

I believe in love with all my heart. I believe that love is the most important thing to have and that every person deserves to know how amazing love is. So I might be a little biased in this. But why cant people be ok with others planning their life around love. 

Obviously sometimes people will give up everything for someone else and THAT is unhealthy. But nobody sees the difference between compromise and complete loss of desire for anything else in life. It is all considered the same. It is all considered unhealthy. 
And obviously the choice to follow love might not always turn out to be what you wanted it to be. The love might not last. But at least you gave it a chance. 

You hear about the one that got away. And everyone knows when somebody has a person in their life who can be labeled as that. Chances are you're not going to ever get them back. But school is going to be there forever. You can always move to the state you wanted to live in all along. You can always go get the job you dreamed of years ago. But you might not always be able to find a love like the one you once knew. 

Remember to follow your dreams and to also follow your heart
- dyl